I want you to know up front that I don’t know the answer. So don’t start reading this with the expectation that all will be revealed by the end. Not happening. Anyway.
Here’s the deal. I’ve taken a little break from writing. Well…more like a hiatus. I severed all ties. Why? A few reasons. Namely, I had other things going on, like new jobs. I don’t know how I was able to work full time and do anything else. Wow. Point is, I pretty much quit.
And it’s strange because writing used to be this thing that I had to do, you know? I used to write for hours. I’m talking about those intense writing sessions where you’d only move to pee. You didn’t eat. You didn’t sleep. Come to think of it, writing is extremely hazardous to your health. It’s a wonder I’m not dead. But I digress.
Maybe I just don’t have many ideas. Maybe that’s why I spent so long on the same story…because I didn’t have anything else to say.
Until I wrote this short story, a very depressing short story, that sort of scared me. Just a little. Then I tried again, and I wrote YA. I love reading YA. It’s less complicated to understand. And I relate to YA characters more than most adult characters. Probably shouldn’t admit to that. Oh well. Anyway, I loved writing YA! And from a boy’s POV! It was refreshing to get back to writing again.
But that was over a year ago now. There’s an opportunity I have to submit this story to an online magazine. Awesome, right?
(Time out. I submitted an excerpt of this story to a different thing, and I am saving this for a future post, but, let me just say, 🙂 ).
So now I’m focusing on this story as a whole. I need to revisit it and give it a trim, however slight, and send it into this magazine. It’ll be great! I love my story! So what’s the problem?
I can’t rekindle the flame. Cliche, yes. Do I care, no.
I don’t know why I can’t just open the document and read my story. What am I afraid of? Do I think it’s not as good as I remember? Will I read it and change my mind about submitting it? Is there something else I should be doing instead? Possibly, maybe, probably not.
I’m a double pro at avoiding and procrastinating. Take this blog post for example. I’ll be honest with you. The only reason I’m writing it is to put off reading my story. I thought, hey, it’s Wednesday. Writing Wednesday. Time to blog. And here we are.
Was there a point to this post? Hmm. Not really. I’m no closer to starting the editing process, my laptop battery is dying, and now I’m hungry. #writerlife
Off to YouTube to find a TedTalk on procrastination. Until next week, writing chums.